hehe:)

What would you feel if you found out a senior liked you...

Well,

It is a very weird feeling.

But he is the SWEETEST senior ever!

And he isn't too bad on the eyes either:)

Oh baby!

I am so happy I can date right now:)

Well,

I haven't written for a while.

So I will catch up on my life breify.

Nothing much.

I am starting a new diet :/

I am starting this new gym class with my papa

With none other than one of my Young Women leaders!

I have gone to the gym for the past two days;)

I am SORE!

But it is a good feeling.

Yep.

That's basically all:)

thanksgiving

Wow.

Well I feel sorta selfish.

I posted on Thursday and I didn't say one thing about Thanksgiving.

It is such a wonderful holiday.

There are so many things to be grateful for.

Now where to begin....
Well, basically EVERYTHING!!
My house, cars, shirts, money, scriptures, pencils, pens, paper, school, shoes, computer, Internet, television, educational teachers, hats, shorts, pants, deodorant, DVDs, purse, bus pass, property, Bishop, Stake President, Young Women Leaders, My momma, my papa, Ethan, Elisha, Shelby, Cousins, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Sadie my puppy, My dear friends, Music, Piano, trees, grass, journals, Holy Ghost, Jesus Christ, Heavenly Father, nail polish, Prophet, Apostles, Scripture role models,
On and on and ON!
It could take up a lot more space, but you get the idea right?
There is so much to be grateful for!

Life is pretty good.
Church today was absolutely amazing.
I cried.
I also joined the Ward Choir TODAY,
and we sang a song in church TODAY!
My old Bishop,
Ya, he's my Sunday School teacher.
I love him.
He taught a great lesson.
Then Relief Society.
Hmm.
Ya.
It twas good:)

Oh ya,
And my Stake President called me tonight.
haha.
He asked me if I wanted to be on the Stake Girls Camp commitee for next year.
I said "YES!"
I'm excited:)

yeehaw!

My Grandma is the BEST!

We had a little grandchildren party yesterday:)

We watced 17 Miracles

**one of the best movies ever**

Made happy turkey apples,

Went on a turkey scavenger hunt,

and Ate PIZZA:)

Then,

Me and Jess had a great adventure.

Her dad had made a trench of leaves in her front yard,

so we took turns standing in a garbage can,

Smooshing leaves and flipping them in.

Then we pushed each other around in the garbage can:)

It was so warm and comfy that I actually stayed in there quite a while.

But when it was time for me to come out,

She wouldn't help me out!

So now I have a large bruise on the back of my leg.

Just because It was super awkward to get out!

Haha:)

Then me and Sabrina got together and talked,

And talked,

and talked!!

We talked for a few hours actually:)

Hm.

Yesterday was good:)

"into the woods"

What a Naughty, Naughty musical.

GREAT music,

Bad scene,

Amazing actors and actresses,

But mostly,

The friends who were with me.

Haha,

Maddie, Erin, and Sabrina.

Wow.

Those three crack me up.

After the play ended I drove them over to JCW's

where we got yummilicious shakes:)

Then after dropping Maddie off,

Me, Erin, and Sabrina went to pay Tanner Durfee a little visit.

He ate HALF of my shake:(

But we gotta finish watching this funny "space chimp" movie with his family.

Oh his family is good.

We had to leave early though because Sabrina had a curfew.

But this was what I really needed/wanted.

A GIRLS night.

[with a boy thrown in there]

And it is also very encouraging when you are trying to help some one and they actually listen to you.

Thanks Mystery person who listens to me.

I hope I don't come across as being rude:)

hmm. well.

I really love reading other peoples blogs.

They have the Most Inspirational things on them,

that lift you up when your down.

People always know what to blog about when I need it.

Everyone out there is

Psychic.

Literally.

I feel terrible for thoughts I have thought,

words I have said,

people I have hurt,

but mostly,

things I never did to help.

I'm not trying to complain,

Just thinking out loud.

I really love the Gospel and all it has done for me.

I have been trying to get closer to my Father in Heaven.

I have been trying to pray more sincerely,

I pray for people I envy,

people that bug me out of my mind,

people I love,

even people I have never met.

I am full of some guilt and regret.

People I have envied,

[and still envy at times]

I took that they had the most perfect life.

They got every boy that came their way,

had all of the friends I wished I had,

took the attention of everyone when they walk into a room,

Everything.

Lately,

I've come to realize,

How single-minded I was.

I just wanted to become them,

I don't know what they are going through.

No one is perfect.

I am DEFINITELY NOT perfect.

THEY are NOT perfect.

The only person to ever walk this earth that is perfect,

is my beloved Savior and Redeemer,

Jesus Christ.

He died for me.

He made it possible for me to return to him.

"Jesus said love everyone"

So what am I doing right now?

Disobeying.

It is hard to comprehend the perfect example our Savior really was for us.

It was possible for him.

Although I'm not perfect,

I have a goal.

To be as good of a Daughter of God as I can be,

while I am on this earth.

My goal is to be perfect one day.

I want to live in the Celestial Kingdom with my Father.

I want to make my Creator proud.

I will do that by living up to my fullest potential while I am on this earth.

Oh ya,

I LOVE my Patriarchal Blessing.

It has done wonders in my life.

On my whiteboard in my room,

I have written a lot of main points in it to help through my every day life.

My favorite part is:

"Your Father in heaven sees you, His daughter, on a pathway to perfection."

I read that everyday.

It gives me hope and a purpose in my life.

I love Him.

And I know He loves me.

I will always strive to do better,

But I know that if I stumble along the way,

He will always be there to catch me when I fall,

Be my friend when I don't have any,

and most important to me,

Forgive me.

just when you think life is perfect...

Uhm.

Drama from family?

Some.

How is my heart taking it?

Painfully.

Why does it have to happen to them?

They are too sweet of a person to be getting curious!

If only they would break off something.

Even though that something really grows on you.

It is ruining their life!

Well,

On another note,

I got presented to my Ward today as being a laurel.

And my Bishop embarrassed me:)

but he is still good:)

birthday party

Oh my:)

Spent a night in a hotel with Sabrina and Jess,

Stayed up and exercised from 1-2 AM!

Watched chick flicks,

ate A TON of junk food,

mani-pedi,

Peelable face masks,

Shopping...

And best of all.....

Breaking Dawn:):):):)

Such a cute movie.

Well....actually,

It's interesting.

Not as bad as some people have described it though.

But, different.

And I am IN LOVE with Taylor Lautner.

Hmm.

Uhm.

May I just say,

ADORABLE:)

And he cries.

So precious:):):):)

seminary thought from Brother Hales...

We can all agree that girls require Time and Money

Girls = Time x Money

"Time is Money"

Time = Money

Girls = Money x Money = Money^2

"Money is the root of all evil"

Money = square root of evil

Girls = (square root of evil)^2

Girls = evil

Ya, too bad blogger doesn't let you do math terms...:(

Oh well:)

So then Bethany thought of this one:

We can all agree that guys have no thought process

Guys = no thought process

Not letting virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly = bad

bad = (evil)^2

Guys = (evil)^2

Guys = double evil!

Ya, it was a good lesson:):)

what to feel?

I feel completely emotionless right now.

I don't know what to feel!

My brain is just content with everything,

nothing spontaneous is going on,

nothing terrible sad,

no drama,

Nothing.

I guess I am just living my life.

Nothing super interesting.

Just living.

It feels sorta nice just to live.

No worries about boys,

No annoyances,

[well not exactly]

Besides just doing homework and driving,

NOTHING!!

i love you

In school,

I almost fell asleep at least in 3 different classes,

I had a special boy talk to me

when I was walking across campus all by myself,

he came up beside me and said

"You looked lonely walking by yourself."

Aw:)

I have a new Marshpa:) Oh Trevor;)

Me and another special boy had a decent conversation,

I also decided I really love Yoga,

We have been doing it for the past week and a half in PE,

and Today,...

I really needed it just to swim in my own thoughts and not care what others think of you.

I HATE the retards that infest the roads.

CONSTRUCTION

is also progressing higher on my "Things I dislike" list.

I gotta drive Sabrina to Range again tonight,

and we made a surprise visit to Erik:)

I gotta eat some yummy Cake in celebration of Erin's 17 birthday,

I finally got my Case Study paper written!

And me and the lovely Sabrina DIED over our homework.

We basically were falling asleep as we attempted to do her math homework.

But she shared a very special story about a very special boy with me.

It was very CUTE:)

It also made me realize how surprised I am with my feelings.

I am not trying to be judgemental in the least,

but.......eh....I just don't know.

Have you ever noticed how over used the phrase

"I love you"

is?

Kristen has a newly found hubby

and she let me read some of their conversation...

Well, they've only been going out for about a few days,

But they were already arguing over who loves who the most!

I'm just weird and I think that's weird...but...

I don't know.

Saying "I love you" should be very special.

Not thrown about like little girls throw glitter at parties,

Even saying it to some of your girlie friends can be over used.

Maybe I am just old-fashioned,

but, I don't want "I love you" to lose is specialness.

Sorta like kisses.

Don't give 'em away like pretzels.

Save them.

It's weird to hear all of these girls going off about all these boys they've kissed,

when I have never kissed one.

I can't believe that they can so freely give them away!

yes...again

Not trying to be judgemental.

But those are my thoughts and feelings toward certain things.

And yes, I know I am VERY old-fashioned.

new.

Hey.

I got a new blog about other stuff.

the link is

sydneymarieward.blogspot.com

my preference experience

Well,
Preference.
Anticipation? HIGH.
Memories? A few.
Pictures? ILLEGAL Pictures:)
Flowers? With pretty little Butterflies!
The dance? It's fun ditching the boys;)
Dinner? Obnoxiously loud:) [With tips]
School Pictures? Creative.....?
Overall? Pretty fun:):)

525,600 minutes

Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes,

Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Moments so dear,

Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes,

How do you Measure--Measure a Year?

In Daylights--In Sunsets,

In Midnights--In Cups of Coffee,

In Inches--In Miles,

In Laughter--In Strife,

In Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes,

How do you Measure,

A Year in a Life?

Good Song:):)

It came to mind as I was on the computer

ATTEMPTING to do my homework.

But as you can see,

I can't really concentrate.

Obviously because I am writing on my blog.

Yup,

Better get back to my homework:)

11:11

Wishes.

They can give everyone hope.

I made two great wishes yesterday.

One in my physics class,

Where we Partied it up!

And the other at Heather's house last night,

where we dance merrily around her firepit

[while squishing marshmellows]

Did either wish come true?

Yes and No.

Will I tell you my wish?

Nope:)

I hope all of your 11:11 wishes will come true.

ugh.

Haha,

After having such a wonderful time eating

DORITOS, and HERSHEY'S,

I got on the Bus with Amanda.

She is my Ucasian Bestie:):)

We were talking when suddenly...

BLOOD!!

Ya, Not too pretty of a sight.

I had to use my sweatshirt as a tissue because,

Well.

Who carries tissues in their back pocket?

Not me:)

But Luckily there was this ever so kind man.

He gave me some tissues:)

Yup,

That's my Story:)

understanding

Yes,

I have been quite bored this evening.

This is my THIRD post today:)

Actually just a lot has been on my mind.

I like it when people understand.

It just makes you feel Oh so good:)

Especially since you've been thinking about it for a while.

It's great to know that they understand.

Hmm,

Yes,

Oh so very good:)

And I got to talk to my cousin!

Apparently she just moved to CALIFORNIA!!

Sadly, she didn't even tell me she was moving...

It made me sorta sad.

She was one of my Favorites:)

But I might get to hang with her during Thanksgiving!!

Yay:)

messages

Oh ya,

one more:)

Me and Sabrina talked to a certain person,

It went rather well.

Yes, I'm stealing Janelle's idea of calling them

THEM.

[just cause we are talking about the same person]

Well them was listening when we were explaining why we weren't gonna text them anymore.

Them didn't really seem to be listening.

Them was kinda off in their own world.

But towards the end,

them seemed to finally understand the seriousness about what we were saying.

Hopefully them will understand.

And maybe them won't bug a lot of us anymore.

Too much emotion.

Good luck to them:)

And we only did this out of Love for them.

birthday wishes:)

Wow!

My birthday couldn't have gotten any better:)

Bethany broke into my locker and decorated it,

Jessica and Anna broke into my room and decorated it,

[I know, a lot of people broke into my things:)]

and Erin and Sabrina made me a lovely cake and card!!

To top it all off,

I gotta go on a church date with Bradan.

Yup, he was my first day.

Really the only guy I would want to date,

besides the other kid he is usually with:)

and a few others...

ANYWAY,

I'm happy he was my first date.

And oh ya,

I also got my

License!!

Wahoo!!

Ya, Yesterday was good:)

I love being sixteen.

Now I just can't wait for Preference.

Heather and Erin are gonna be great doubles:)

yay:)

i'm sixteen!!

Finally,

the moment I've been waiting for

for the LONGEST time has finally come

and sadly gone away too quickly.

I have many great stories of what people did for me today,

but I'll write tomorrow cause I'm tired:)

Let's just say,

It has been good:)

drama...

Misunderstood.

Misinterpreted.

Feelings hurt,

No one really knowing the truth.

What to think.

What to do.

Oh well,

There really is nothing you can do at this point.

Hopefully the person causing the drama will realize it,

and make it better.

If not,

I'll still be praying that they will.

trying to be better

I love my best friends.

They have helped me through so much in my life.

If I didn't have them,

I would be a completely different person.

No doubt about that.
Even my friends who I am not so close to.
They are constantly inspiring me to be better,
I look up to them and their great examples.
In my last post about wanting to hurt them...
Well, lets just say my feelings have changed.
I really have been striving to become stronger in the church
and build my testimony about the gospel.
I have recently gotten an "I'm a Mormon" page
[Thanks to Heather, which I actually read on her blog and such]
I have been trying my best and I have really seen the blessing come through.
I pray before I go into tests,
and the next thing you know, I remember an answer that I need!
I pray before I go to help out a friend,
and I know exactly what to say and I feel like I got my message across.
I pray before everything challenging,
and everything turns out just perfectly:)

If I may suggest a book to every girl,
It would be Diary of a Teenage Girl: Caitlin O'Conner
It is a mixture about a 16-17 year old girl
who is dating and is becoming a stronger Christian.
She is not LDS sadly,
but it has really helped me focus on my testimony
and make some important commitments in my life.
I think I like it because I can relate to Caitlin a lot.
Elisha never really liked it,
But I DO:):)

Anyway:)
I'm grateful for this gospel.
And this is a great video that inspires me.
It is the person I want to be the most in my life.
A virtuous Daughter of God.
The Lost Purse
[Click on it and it will bring you to the video:)]

relationships.

Yes, sadly all the things I am thinking about at the moment.

I love my friends and all,

but sometimes you just want to

hurt them....

It is very painful to even think that.

I really do care about my friends,

and every day I think what my life would be like if they weren't there,

and every day I think what it would be like if I still went to AF,

but it usually always comes up to things I HATE thinking about.

I have recently gotten rid of a huge burden in my life.

This burden has actually been a person.

I hate to sound rude,

but ever since I stopped talking to this person,

I feel so much happier and less sad.

They were constantly bringing me down

and I would cry over them quite a lot

because I didn't know what to do for them.

This person has also led me to write this:

***I Sydney Marie Ward, on this beautiful Thursday morning of November 3, do make a promise to myself that I WILL NOT get a boyfriend until I graduate high school in the year of 2014. By making this decision, I will still date my peers and enjoy my high school years with lots of friendships instead of RELATIONSHIPS.***

Edmond Tanner Durfee has been my *motivation* and *inspiration* for me to make this decision. If he can do it, I can do it. Due to a conversation we had back in August-September.

Even if he caves and gets into a relationship, I will still stand strong in my decision.

I have been making this decision in my mind for a while now,

but this just makes it real.

So if I ever have the chance to while I am in high school,

I will have already made my mind up.

I am not saying anything bad to those who do have boyfriends or girlfriends,

I am just simply making this decison for myself.

Thank you:)

rain

Rain,

my good ol' friend,

you have finally returned,

But I am thankful for you,

because you make everything green and beautiful.

I like to look for rainbows whenever there is rain,

And ponder on the Beauty of an earth made clean again.

 I want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain,

 I want to be the best I can,

and live with God again.